Expedition 9 to 5

My Mom grew up in the great state of Michigan, in a small farm town called Caro (where she also shared the same 4th grade class with her future husband and father of her children). That story needs a whole other post, so we will just go ahead and jump to when my Dad graduates from West Point, my parents get married, and then move straight to Germany. Now, Mom was under the impression that her top choice of location, Fort Lewis (based in Seattle), was not available. My Dad had told a small fib because this option was certainly on the table, but he thought Europe would be an exciting adventure. She describes her farewell at the airport as “embarrassingly emotional” as she did cry from the moment they were dropped off until they got on the plane. If you know Annie, you know she’s not much of a crier, so this was news to me.

I grew up listening to riveting stories of their adventures in Europe over games of Euchre and family outings, never stopping to think about the sacrifice and strength it takes to follow the career path of a spouse before your own. When I asked her about the difficulties of being a military wife, she told me about the struggles of being in a brand-new marriage in a brand-new country and finding her own purpose on this big adventure. 

While occasionally tumultuous, she describes this time in her life as one of the most exciting. Her days were filled with unique experiences, curiosity, and learning how to navigate a new marriage in a foreign country at a time when cell phones and google maps couldn’t guide you from one place to the next. Along with the incredible stories of scuba diving trips in Croatia, convoying to the Alps for some skiing with the on-post rec department, and taking their delayed honeymoon to the Turkish Mediterranean, she cited some difficulties with this new move. Outside being thrifty on an officer’s salary and the cost of long-distance phone calls, there is one story that primarily stands out to me. Mom went to the bank in Germany to withdraw money to pay their rent. However, she was not able to pull out cash from their shared bank account without her husband present. If Dad was inaccessible in the field or on deployment, she needed a power of attorney to withdraw her own money. Sounds like some pre-19th Amendment bullshit, but this was circa 1993. It’s a small example, but it’s a look into the difficulties of being a military spouse and the choices that are often times taken from you. Mom never got a say in what country, city, or town came next. She always saw this sacrifice as the next adventure in her life. 

Despite these challenges in Germany, she found a job working for the City Colleges of Chicago and doing a bit of her own travel. She explored new cities, she ate in restaurants alone, she learned German, she made friends, she educated herself, she tried new food, she biked to local festivals and Christmas markets, and she saw the world through a whole new lens. She found her purpose, she always does. When the opportunity came for me to take an internship in France, she encouraged me to do the same. Her advice whenever I travel somewhere new is to always immerse yourself in the culture and learn the history of the places you travel through. 

My mom has taught me countless lessons, but I am most thankful for her emboldening me to take agency in my life and be unafraid. 

Mom, thank you for empowering me to take chances and trust my intuition. Without your support,  I would not have the courage to say “no” to the opportunities that are wrong for me and “yes” to the ones that excite and scare me just a little.

TLDR: My mom is a badass.